{"id":181,"date":"2009-02-07T18:41:15","date_gmt":"2009-02-08T02:41:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.fatbeetle.com\/?p=181"},"modified":"2010-06-03T00:49:11","modified_gmt":"2010-06-03T00:49:11","slug":"not-my-news","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.fatbeetle.com\/blog\/?p=181","title":{"rendered":"Not my news!"},"content":{"rendered":"
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I don’t have anything to say this month, it’s all been written up in the “New Zealand Trip Misadventure”,<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n

So here’s a some news from our guest correspondent,\u00a0 Alan Harness, instead.\u00a0 For those of you not acquainted with him (consider yourself blessed) Alan is an old mate, who I first met at college back in Plymouth in the early 80’s. Alan, and others who deserve more from me than I am able to repay, were for the main part responsible for my surviving the course. If I hadn’t survived that, I may not have ended up here, so be grateful to them. I also introduced him to his wife, Jo, and\u00a0 now they’ve now been wed for twenty years, something she’s never forgiven me for. I also have the privilege of being godfather to Alan and Jo’s two wonderful sons, Tom and Jack. Alan and family live in North Devon, England.<\/span>
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

Well briefly, we’ve had an eventful run up to xmas and beyond.<\/p>\n

Xmas eve I took the boys climbing\/scrambling at Baggy Point<\/a>. We’d lowered ourselves down onto a rocky platform, just where a stainless steel manhole had been let into the rocks. We were clowning about on it, the water just starting to wash about the manhole. I laughed at Jack as he only had walking boots on and I had wellies. <\/em><\/p>\n

Sooooo<\/em>… I showed him how it should be done!\u00a0 However the sea won!!! I got SMASHED by a huge wave, it pulled the rope out of my hands, smacking me over on the rocks and dumping me six foor further down the cliff and onto a lower rocky platform. I landed\u00a0 on my back\/side. Then it washed me out to sea. Bugger! Winded, in shock, and wearing wellies, jeans and a big heavy cotton top, this position was not really very tenable…. Oh and the sea was freezing, and the air frosty.<\/p>\n

To cut a long story short, I ditched the wellies, Jack took care of the dogs, I sorted Tom out to throw the rope to me, and I made painfully slow headway back to the rocks. Fortunately, Neptune had had his laugh and didn’t send any more bigguns to finish off the job. Yes, I’m a very lucky bunny with a very painfull back, hip and elbow. Hey ho. I lost my mobile phone, a pair of wellies and \u00a3240 worth pair of Oakley prescription sunglasses I bought to cellebrate becoming a sensible paramedic!<\/p>\n

Just after Xmas, Jack and I went to get some wood in from the wood\u00a0store which is at the bottom of the garden\u00a0 in the chicken run. Jack went in first as I was ‘fixing’ the gate so I could lock the chickens in and thereby leave our front gate open, so the delivery twat could drop off my new phone (insurance job!)<\/p>\n

The next thing I was aware of was a bloke pushing past Jack, meeting me and saying; “Oh, sorry mate, I was just sleeping rough!”<\/p>\n

Basically, he had been hiding under the tarpaulin of the wood store. We’ve had stuff nicked on three separate occasions from our place, so I was a bit ticked off by this. I told Jack to call the Police, and so I set about delaying the “lodger” til they got here.<\/p>\n

Being a lad of some great sense, Jack also got Tom up, Tom’s significantly more ‘handy’ than I ever was. (Taff says “I can vouch for that, Harness is not a man you’d want to cross, but Tom for all his young age is hard as nails and a\u00a0 rugby player of potential greatness.”)<\/em><\/p>\n

To cut a long story short, the lodger was getting bored of my thrilling tales of daring do, and decided he wanted to leave by climbing over the back fence. I invited him to stay by throwing him to the floor, and Tom and I got him well ‘locked up’. When the Police arrived they were amazed to see the screaming was coming from him and not us.<\/p>\n

It turns out he’d just done a burglary up the road a little way, and had used the connecting back alleyway behind our property as a get away.<\/p>\n

All morning, a Police helicopter had been buzzing about trying to find him, and there he as happily hiding under the tarp in our garden …. doh!<\/p>\n

The bobbies were dead chuffed with us on this occasion, they rang us the next day to say he’d been sentenced to 6 months custody… job done.<\/p>\n

Taff says: Make my life sound boring!<\/span><\/p>\n

Since then, fortunately, it’s been a bit quieter.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I don’t have anything to say this month, it’s all been written up in the “New Zealand Trip Misadventure”, So here’s a some news from our guest correspondent,\u00a0 Alan Harness, instead.\u00a0 For those of you not acquainted with him (consider … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[16,36,6],"class_list":["post-181","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-arseing-about","tag-harness","tag-holiday"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.fatbeetle.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/181","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.fatbeetle.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.fatbeetle.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.fatbeetle.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.fatbeetle.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=181"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.fatbeetle.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/181\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.fatbeetle.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=181"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.fatbeetle.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=181"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.fatbeetle.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=181"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}